As the say 'Time & Tide wait for no man' it's so true! Just one day later I'm sat in a hammock on a beach in Fiji watching the sun set and suddenly New Zealand, all sevenish weeks of it are confined to memories, memories already fading. This in truth is what this blog is about, 'notes to self', an old decrepit self with a crap memory (no not now, somewhere down the line).

So some remenicing of our 9,000 kilometre ride around Kiwi Country...

Bites, bites and more bites. Unlike Oz nothing will kill you, but the little buggers will gang up and give it a good go. Kathy holds the records with in the order of 200 bites in one day and here I kid you not! After sunbathing on a sandfly nest she looked like a bikini model for 'Braille Weekly', we had to go to the chemist for advice. The chemist said 'i've never seen that before'. mmm, great!



Campsites, on the whole they put English campsites to shame. Here they have everything you need and more. People choose to live on them, not in a trailer park sort of way though, in a "I'm going to live next to the beach, in the mountains or on a lake (delete as appropriate) & not pay any household bills, not gonna buy washing machines, not worry about gardening etc etc.

Akaroa campsite has a 'no longer need' shelf. People leave food, odd bits of camping gear and other random stuff. Checkout is 10am, between 9.30 & 10.30 a couple of old buzzards of the 'we've retired to a campsite' variety circle the leftovers shelf, swooping in to nab anything of any use or resale value. Which is in my book, a little off and against the spirit of us 'real' campers! You have no idea how tempted I was to lace a couple of cans of rice pudding laced with extra strong laxative and leave it for the old purple rinced vultures!

Kiwi roads, there are motorways, some even have two lanes but don't get excited they don't last long. Many of the 'A' roads have single lane (rickety wooden) bridges, one way has priority, the other gives way (in theory but try arguing with a logging truck). By far the best though is the main highway just south of Hokitika, not only does it narrow to a single lane, it has a bloody train track running along it! I waited and looked, looked and waited then went like a bat out of hell!
It's no wonder that in many places beaches are used as the highway!


Green, Blue & White. The land, the sky, the sea, the surf, the clouds, the plants all come in a variety of green, blue and white. The air is so clear everything is so vivid, beautiful and don't even get me started on the star studded night sky.



Quirky, for a Brit abroad the Kiwis are a bit quirky, and Wanaka's Cinema Paradiso demonstrates this perfectly. Half time intermission and drinks and meals are delivered to your seat, a seat which could be anything from an old armchair through barber chair to the front seats of an open top beatle. Get there early for the choice of armchair, oh and book - it only seats 40 or 50 people. The still warm fresh baked cookies are a must at half time!



Political Incorrectness, if you are one of the loony PC brigade from the UK, stay well away! It's quite refreshing to have Tv and Radio presenters say what they (& you) are really thinking. "freedom campers, they are vermin and should be shot", "85th in the Olympic downhill, that's crap but at least she got a free holiday", bugger that, $hit and other mild swearing.


Anyway, bugger this blogging lark I'm on my hols and the sun is shining...

1: the more tent pegs you hammer in, the less windy it will be.
2: the more rain gear you carry, the sunnier the weather.
3: you can't fill the ice box with beer and still get ice in, you must leave some room.
4: the rustling of the tent at night is only the wind NOT a man eating bear.
5: the further away from the toilet block the greater the frequency of night time peeing required (nothing to do with rule 3).

I'm staring out across the pacific, at the horizon aquamarine turns sky blue. There's a loan kite surfer riding the breakers, he has the ocean to himself.








The golden sand stretches for miles either side of me, I can see one guy walking his dog and that's it. We're not miles from anywhere, we are just 10km east of Gisborne (Hawkes Bay, New Zealand).

Oh hang on, that bloke with the dog is wearing a bikini so either I need my eyes testing or he needs a new hobby...

Today is Kathy's birthday and with a touch of extravagance we eat out (a full cooked breaky) and tonight we will dine on a fish n chip supper with cheap fizzy plonk. Which considering that our meals of late have been fixed on a one ring camping stove is pure luxury.

Location:Otuki

So we motored coast to coast leaving the big mountains behind and rocking up at Dunedin 'Top 10' for a night in a cabin. Umm'd and arr'd whether to stay a couple of nights or crack on. Weather forecast won out, we hit the road first thing and tracked the ocean all morning.




Huge spherical boulders litter the beach at Moeraki, it's out of the way but somehow managed to draw the coach parties who all dilligently queue up for photos. We though ignore that, climb up and strike various poses atop God's marbles.



Ever onward, we push on and have lunch in Omarau, again decide not to overnight and with one last big push make it to Akaroa, and pitch up the tent high up on a hill overlooking this little 'French' harbour town.


A French ship's captain 'bought' the penisula from the Maori then shipped a bunch of settlers over. The Brits soon sorted all that nonsense out but the town still has many 'Rues' and has a bouchier, boulangerie & flies the French flag!
A couple of nights here then we pushed on to Kiakora, sealife capital of NZ.



Kiakora up to Picton, four nights camping & sightseeing, up early for the ferry and that's that. South island 'done'!

Location:Picton, Marlborough, New Zealand

Accidentally discovered by a Welshman, lost in a storm and named after Milford Haven, his home town. Right that's the history lesson, now for the present...






Dark brooding clouds hang over the horizon and there is rain in the air, the first for three weeks - it could just spoil the Milford Sound cruise!

The drive in from Te Anau was fabulomundouso (I've run out of superlatives so I'm making them up), foot hills surrounding the lakes give way to vertical cliff faces, water cascading down from snow, piled high on the peaks. The wind chases the angry clouds away and the sun makes it's appearance.





Glaciers, cut these valleys and they did a bloody good job. Snow melt gathers to form creeks, creeks to form rivers which in turn cut their own way through the land.





Kathy heeds the danger signs...





Before clambering into the ice caves for the obligatory photo op ( who said she would not try dangerous sports!)





A smile or a worried grimace?





We're lucky, the wind drops and Mitre peak is reflected in all it's glory.





Our boat (Milford Mariner) and berth for the night cruises in, we board and set out for the next adventure.
We cruise, we kayak (kathy is spectacularly bad at this), we swim, dine, drink & collapse into bed at 10.30! Early? In fact we and new Berliner friends are the last to bed, somehow the rest of the guests are a SAGA party and we are the youngsters!

Breaky starts at 7am, the early to bed, early to rise SAGA bunch are already circling the buffet, fortunately there's food aplenty.





We cruise back through the sound as the sun rises over the mountains, dolphins and seals chase the boat's bow wave and treat us to some acrobatic showmanship.






A great way to end the cruise, and we still have that amazing scenic drive to get back to civilization!

After four fab days on the north coast we are heading south to the big mountains. With 2 big drives to get there an overnight break on the west coast is a must. Most people go for Greymouth (which unfortunately lives up to it's name) or Franz Joseph for a glacier visit. We though have opted for a couple of nights in Hokitika and it is quite a find!
There's a driftwood scuplture competition on the beach.


My fave was the Flintstones bike but the winner was a minature sand dune sculpture...



Inland a few miles and Hokitika gorge is beautiful, the water is unaturally blue, luminous in fact and contrast with the White rocks.





Waterfalls on way back...



And a late picnic on a deserted beach. The west coast beaches go on for ever, the waves crash in, the sun shines and snow capped mountains line the horizon - amazing!


We finish the day with fish 'n' chips on Hokitika front watching the sun set turning the sky every shade of red, purple and orange.

Location:Bealey St,Hokitika,New Zealand

Cooke Strait, the crossing between NZ's two largest islands has a reputation for ferocity, oceans collide & sailers beware.

We though sail out of Wellington on a calm evening and weave our way into Picton as the sun sets. Quite Amazing...

Location:Cooke Strait, New Zealand

oday was water themed.

This morning it rained, then it rained some more.

There is a lot of space in New Zealand and it's packed full of scenery, but not much else. Its big and the major towns are hours and hours apart, so it should cme as no surprise that when it comes to entertaining yourself the Kiwis invented some wacky stuff.

''I'm bored, what shall we do?''
''I've got a long bit of rubber''
''er, OK''
''Why don't we tie one end to that bridge and the other to our ankles and then jump off'''
''beats lookng at all this scenery''

and so the bungy jump was born!

but, not all the wacky stuff was so full on...

"I have a sheep, let's paint it pink"


"I need a sign, let's paint one"
"wait, I have some corrugated steel, let's make the sign out of that"

"sweet as, bro!"